How to start with self love.

All these images on this blog are of me! In different stages of my line.

Before I got into the fitness industry 3.5 years ago, I worked in an office for 8/9 years.

My posture was terrible, my diet was terrible and my exercise regime was all over the place.

I’ve been every end of the fitness spectrum.

From over weight, skinny fat, overtrained, undernourished, to the ultimate ‘goal’ 6 pack abs and competing in a physique competition.

The common issue throughout all these transformations was I was never happy with my body or my life.

I told myself I’m not good enough, fit enough, pretty enough, worthy, or deserving and it infected every area of my life!

My days were spent worrying about the way I looked, how unhappy I was, I would grab my fat roll around my belly, wishing it would just disappear, then grab a packet of biscuits and eat the lot. I'd then punish myself for hours at the gym.

But you know its funny, when I got into the fitness industry, I still felt the same, only I was a little more educated on training principles and food choices for body composition. So I started to gain muscle and change my shape.

Was I happy - nope.

I started prepping for a bikini competition and got lean and finally for the first time in my life I seen my abs!

Was I happy?

Yeah for a few weeks then that got old fast when I was tired, grumpy and hungry. I would grab my little fat pouch and freakout why I still had it. I would hourly lift up my shirt to see if my abs were still there or if they had vanished by eating one meal, it was obsessive and ridiculous.

Oh yes girls, some of us will genetically hold more fat in our midsection than others, even at really low body fat.

It was only after my latest show at the end of 2016, when I competed overseas was I really content with how I looked coming out of the show. I was no longer training for body composition but for strength and performance.

I enjoyed dinners out with my partner and friends and yes I seen my shape change and my abs disappear but for the first time I was genuinely happy with my body, my life, my relationships.

I realised that happiness was not based on my aesthetics but came from within and my thoughts every day.

My weight has moved from 57kg to 67-68kg but i honestly COULD NOT GIVE A SHIT! As long as i am able to train the way i want, live a life i want and still be active when I'm turning 50 years old, the scale could not mean less to me.


Shifting your mindset from a place of negativity and self loath to a place of self love and positivity doesn’t happen over night.

It takes time.

It requires you to really listen to what you tell yourself, those inner most thoughts and catch them when they turn negative. It requires you to make some changes to your actions and behaviours.

But day by day if you start injecting some positive thoughts into everything you do it will eventually shift.

Learn to eat to nourish your body, train because it makes you feel good, not to burn calories or punish yourself. Start to give your body what it needs and it will in return give you what you need.

I am finally happy because I understood what it was to love myself.

My biggest purpose in life is to show women that there is another way to live, to eat to train, without these negative feelings.

Because abs dont make you happy trust me.

Ella Martyn is a Specialist in Online Female Fitness Coaching, focusing on a balanced approach to health and fitness.

Ella can help you take back the control over your diet, your happiness and your results. With a personalised approach to TRAINING and NUTRITION,

Ella can ensure the right balance of training, diet and lifestyle to optimise your success for the long term.

Simply drop Ella an EMAIL today to find out how you can get started on your health and fitness journey for the last time!

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